Thursday, November 09, 2006

"The Onion" strikes again


WASHINGTON, DC—Republican officials are blaming tonight's GOP losses on
Democrats, who they claim have engaged in a wide variety of "aggressive,
premeditated, anti-Republican campaigns" over the past six-to-18 months. "We
have evidence of a well-organized, well-funded series of operations designed
specifically to undermine our message, depict our past performance in a negative
light, and drive Republicans out of office," said Republican National Committee
chairman Ken Mehlman, who accused an organization called the Democratic National
Committee of spearheading the nationwide effort. "There are reports of
television spots, print ads, even volunteers going door-to-door encouraging
citizens to vote against us." Acknowledging that the "damage has already been
done," Mehlman is seeking a promise from Democrats to never again engage in
similar practices.

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